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"If I had to live without you I'd shoot myself. But only in the foot.I love you but I'm not an idiot.

Please note CHRISTMAS IS CANCELLED, apparently YOU told Santa that you have been GOOD this year...he died laughing.

Christmas is cancelled funny funny quotes humor christmas santa christmas quotes christmas quote christmas humor

This carpet isnt the only thing you'll be riding tonight omg, disney movies Valentines Day Card

This carpet isnt the only thing you'll be riding tonight omg, disney movies Valentines Day Card

Bowchikkawowow........and suddenly she just cracked up with happiness and laughter......keep it coming Babe!x

I now know how to spell bowchikkawowow. Thank you, mildly perverted Venn diagram.

OMG! SO WRONG! YET SO HILARIOUS!!

Funny Confession Ecard: So I heard they're naming a new paint color after you. It's called Whore Red. Not very bright, but it's cheap and spreads really easily.

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