A JAPANESE CORPORATION: You have two cows. You redesign them so they are one-tenth the size of an ordinary cow and produce twenty times the milk. You then create a clever cow cartoon image called a Cowkimona and market it worldwide.
I'm like Heinz Doofenshmirtz because I, too, like being petty, singing off-key, and over-sharing my deepest traumas for no discernible reason. I also think of myself as evil but am at best a minor inconvenience.