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I told my friend "before I die I want my last words to be 'I left a million dollars under the." I said "One minute, I have to die first." He said "oh, okay. How long will that take?" I replied "not really sure.

Haha.  Yes

we suck at this

OMG this is so true! All the deep questions come out at bedtime. At bed time my children turn into dehydrated philosophers who need a hug.

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Lol I can’t don’t the alphabet forward most of the time and that’s sober!

Heroes #policequotes

My heroes are those who risk their lives every day to protect our world and make it a better place - police, firefighters and members of our armed forces.

This would be Dan if he had became a lawyer... *shudders at the thought of him as a lawyer, not making YouTube videos with Phil*

why can i relate? i would sing shawty got 'em apple bottom jeans boots with the fur da whole club is looking at her.

Anytime.

What sleep?I'm not Sleeping Beauty.I need my beauty sleep to be alert&healthy&have energy to do my things. There will be other men&opportunities desperados/Speedy Gonzalezes/hasty people. I'm not rushing into anything.

LOLOLOL

OMGQuotes will help you every time you need a little extra motivation. Get inspired by reading encouraging quotes from successful people.

28 Random Memes That’ll Make You Spit Out Your Morning Coffee — April 2017

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