The symptoms of abuse are there, and the woman usually sees them: the escalating frequency of put-downs. Early generosity turning more and more to selfishness. Verbal explosions when he is irritated or when he doesn’t get his way.
You told me I was stuck. You told me I had nowhere to go. You told me I was weak. You told me so many other lies I believed, but I didn't believe those three. And now I can prove it, M. I can ducking prove it. YEAH THAT'S RIGHT, DUCKING.
This isn't meaning material things, it means 'real' things needed for a loving, treasured and respectful relationship. Deeds, qualities, thoughts and characteristics of a decent and mature man who has a loving and good heart.